Freeing myself from the apartment has become quite an emotional battle as of late. With almost nine months of unemployment and a more than lack of inspiration in my artistic ventures piling up, which are necessary to my survival yet are in the back of my mind most days, I had come to a point where I could hardly stand myself and my mind was changing constantly as I searched to find what would make me happy or more productive.

I have not given up all hope, there are new ventures that have become habits in the past nine months. Like ritual bread making, library attendance and our small container garden on the fire escape.

Recently I had decided to expand the garden and went looking for a community garden plot in as close proximity to our apartment and side of town as possible. The only one with an available plot is a ways away, but is a manageable bike ride.
For the last few weeks my mission has been to read as many Canadian gardening and house holding books as possible. Starting small this year with half of my 10X10 plot holding geraniums and nasturtiums so's not to overload myself with a such a huge project.
Planning my ideal garden has been exciting and fun and getting my hand dirty and having a purpose has proven to be most rewarding. I no longer hate myself, can conclude that the out doors is good and will be for me and the garden will provide a much needed connection to something natural, a place to nurture and most of all a place for me to forget everything except whats in front of me.

And all I can hope for is to actually some food at the end of all this.